plants (excerpts)

I know what you're thinking. "Really, Rob? You write about your plants? Really?" Yes, I sometimes do. And when I do, those posts are filed here.

  • What's Up, Chuck? Upchuck? AHAHAHAA!!! ...Ahem.

    And thus marks the end of day #537 of Chuck giving me the silent treatment. It's also probably day #537 of Chuck wishing I'd give him the silent treatment too.

    (November 28, 2012)

  • Is There A Greater God?

    I think Duncan is a houseplant. Duncan thinks I am God Who is to say we're not both right?

    (August 25, 2009)

  • Livin' On A Prayer Plant

    John Paul the Third is a fascinating plant. He raises his leaves at night and then lowers them in the day. He's living with me on a temporary loan, to see if we hit it off... but I'm not sure it's going to work out. Apparently, he has a thing for 80's cheese rockers.

    (September 25, 2007)

  • To Be New

    I was paging through some pictures I took a few years ago, and my gaze fell upon a picture of you. You were nearly three times your current height; so overgrown, no doubt burdened by the weight of your years.

    (August  2, 2006)

  • I Blamed You, But Now...

    I'll take your lack of response as your way of saying you have at least a basic understanding of a color wheel.

    (July 11, 2006)

  • Brokeback Flower Pot

    If you can't fix it, Duncan, then you've got to stand it. I know that. I guess I just gotta stand it. I wish I knew how to quit you.

    (April 29, 2006)

  • The Understudy

    Yes, these are the thoughts that keep me up at night.

    (April 25, 2006)

  • It's Not You, It's... Well, OK. It's You

    But then, one day, I began to realize you weren't playing it cool at all. In fact, you overgrown green moldy-potted son of a bitch, I began to realize that you've been ignoring me all this time.

    (March  9, 2006)

  • Duncan's Tale

    It was a long quiet ride home. Not that I expected my plant to speak to me - but if he 'could have', he still wouldn't have... though I swear I heard him singing Depeche Mode at one point: "Death is everywhere..."

    (May  7, 2004)

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