Son of a bitch! A bird just took a huge crap which splattered along the outside of my kitchen windows. I was cooking lunch and heard the slight ping-ping of a few raindrops hitting the window, followed by a pong indicating a direct hit by something bigger.
By the way, did I say big? Something huge? I meant GIANT!
The crap-splatter easily stretches over two and a half feet long! And since I'm on the 4h story with no openable windows in that part of my apartment, it's not going away unless the rain washes it away.
Thanks a lot bird. What did I ever do to you?