Jalpuna! | How About This?

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How About This?

How about this?

What if we start this whole thing over again. And I won't say the word I said, and you won't think the thought I now watch swirling through your head.

And it'll be just like it was before you knew.

How about this?

I won't say it, and you won't know.

And you won't judge me.
And I won't judge you for judging me.
And I won't have to judge myself for judging you for judging me.

God dammit, don't judge me.

How about this?

It's just a word. But once it's said, there's no getting it back. So I won't let it leave my lips. The letters won't touch my fingertips.

Not today anyway.

How about this?

It's just a word, but the word is mine. Once said, there's no getting it back. Once known, it's time for awkward pauses and thoughtful consideration that will sharpen the line between you and me.

How about this?

I won't ask.

You'll never know that I don't know what that says. You'll never be aware that I'm not aware of what that is.

"After you." I'll say it like a gentleman. You'll never know why I prefer that you lead the way.

How about this?

I'll speak in clever phrases, leading the conversation where I need it to go, and you will do your part. Without realizing it, you will provide the necessary details.

And then I will know.

"Look over there, hey, look over there!
Isn't that great?"

Tell me all about it so I will know what it is. That's my secret - that's my trick. It works every time. OK, almost every time. That's the risk I take, but it's my choice to make and it beats the hell out of the alternative a million times over, let me tell you.

Do I tell you?

Not if I don't have to.

Not today.

Then again, maybe you already know.

Shawnte said:

How could anyone judge you for this? You're YOU, and believe it or not, it's part of what makes you amazing.

::::: | Posted December 15, 2007 9:06 AM