White Trash On Craigslist. No, Really!

I swear to god, you can buy or sell anything on Craigslist. If the item is cool and reasonably priced, it'll go fast. If it's not... well...

I have a trash can I'm hoping to unload. Before I post it in the free stuff section, I thought I'd see if a little humor would fetch twenty bucks.

Here's the ad I posted: (P.S. Need a trash can?)

Sharp-lookin' White Metal Kitchen Trash Can Needs Love - $20, or...? (downtown)

Reply to: anon-108874304@craigslist.org
Date: 2005-11-04, 10:53AM PST

It's a tall white metal trash can for your kitchen, and I'm not kidding about the 'needs love' bit. This can lives for the moments when its master puts a foot on its step-pedal. At that moment, the trash can opens its lid with a big "gimme some of that" grin in anticipation of a gift from its master - which could be you, yes YOU!

Now, I don't feel so good about letting a beloved member of the family go, but I'm doing this for the trash can's own good. My new kitchen is all silver stainless steel and the trash can is white. I walked in the other day and caught my other appliances making fun of it. The conversation was borderline racist, frankly. I believe the fridge called it a honkey, I think the stove might have called it a cracker... and I'm not even going to repeat what the dishwasher said (what a mouth that thing has!).

In a perfect world, I'd give the appliances the boot. But they insist the trash can started it.

I know what you're thinking - "this not-job's trying to pawn off a trash can with an attitude on me?"

No no no... it's not like that at all. This trash can is a sweetie. Really. Well, ok, maybe not. I mean, how sweet could something that craves trash be? However, as far as things that crave trash go, this can is the sweetest of the bunch. I promise you that. Oh, and I'm not a nut-job, F.Y.I.

It's not in perfect shape. It's got a few nicks to its paint - but who doesn't? Right? Exactly. It cost me a hundred big ones but I'm asking for much less. And it still looks ultra trash-can sexy.

So here's the deal: I'll sell you my trash can for $20 - or - I'll trade it for two bottles of red wine (not three buck chuck. Come on now), or two six packs of tasty microbrewesque beer. I'll also tell it all sorts of good things about you, and how it's going to have a better life at your place. Actually, I've already told it all kinds of good things about you... I just neglected to mention a gender or a name. So, when you pick it up, I'll point at you and say "See? Isn't he and/or she really cool?" I'm good like that. Thoughtful. You betcha.

So what do you say? Want to adopt a trash can? I know you do!

trash can

::::: | Friday, Nov 04 2005 at 10:53 AM
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